We all have conflicts, be it in our family, work, or social life. Conflict is inevitable, especially if you are a leader. You have to make the best decisions so as not to create new problems. In work, resolve conflicts usually occur when most members want to produce better quality performance, but others prefer to take a break from work.
In the life of the state, conflicts arise when we, citizens, want more facilities for recreation but the government must see a balance in maintaining tourism growth. Conflicts occur in various sectors.
Avoid and resolve conflicts
Avoiding conflict is seen as the right choice. In fact, it doesn’t solve the conflict we have at all. This will only haunt us more and make the situation more difficult. In addition, avoiding conflict also increases misunderstanding between the parties involved. This will actually hinder open communication and the parties involved are more likely to keep it secret. Of course, this will cost the team.
Many also think that conflict is a final stage before a fight occurs, and they put it aside as if the conflict had never happened before. In fact, conflict is the intersection of individuals and opinions, this does not directly lead to quarrels.
Proper handling of conflict can result in a win-win situation for both parties. For this reason, in this article, fellow readers will be introduced to the Interest Based Relational approach. This is a conflict approach developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury. This approach focuses on ways to build understanding with each other and also build respect that can strengthen the bond between the two parties. Ultimately, this approach can help resolve conflicts in a harmonious way. Here are 6 ways that can be done by fellow readers.
Prioritize good relationships.
How to?
Before discussing or directly discussing the problem at hand, do fellow readers know that conflict can lead to mutual problems and can be resolved peacefully through proper negotiations? And good cooperation will give the best results for the whole team.
Why is this necessary?
It’s easy to ignore the causes of conflict and point to team members who have different views. This is the wrong mindset. You are more likely to blame others, not listen to them. You will fail to acknowledge the real problem. This will damage the good relations between team members and will exacerbate the problem.
Before discussing the problem, make sure that the problem is not entirely someone’s fault. Everyone is responsible for this. Then, it is very important to provide our involvement in the problem and state clearly that we are listening to everyone’s opinion, not accusing.
The cause of the problems that occur is not because of people.
How to?
State clearly that problems are never one-sided. Problems require collaboration. And more importantly, matters need not be taken personally. We are not accusing someone, but looking for a way to deal with it.
Why is this necessary?
If things were taken personally, things would get out of control. Everyone will be irrational and ignore the opinions of others. Then, we will find it difficult to find out the real problem because we do not get a clear picture of the problem. This is due to the respective assumptions.
Despite the differences of opinion we have, we must emphasize that the problem is not the result of someone else’s creation, it is just a difference of perspective. So, if we try to see the problem from the other person’s point of view, we can understand the differences of opinion that exist.
Don’t blame others. Listen to all parties.
How to?
The important thing that fellow readers must remember is not to blame others. Get everyone’s opinion. It’s important to get everyone to contribute to the discussion. Everyone’s involvement is needed in solving problems so that everyone can feel valued.
Why is this necessary?
No one wants to be ignored. If a person feels neglected, then he will become aggressive. Of course this is not what is expected in a discussion. Acknowledging and being recognized are equally important. So, make sure that everyone has the same opportunity to express their thoughts. If someone’s opinion is heard, it will also be easy for him to listen to other opinions.
An easy way to get people to feel involved is to invite them to speak first. In this way, he realized that his opinion was also heard. Also show that you really listen to them by making direct eye contact and nodding. Most importantly, don’t interrupt if someone hasn’t finished it yet.
Listen, then follow.
How to?
Make sure everyone is listening to each other. This can be done by giving the opportunity to speak in turns first before moving on to the discussion. Again, emphasize that the problem is not someone’s problem and there is no need to make excuses.
Why is this necessary?
By taking turns speaking, everyone has the same opportunity and can listen to each other. It also builds a person’s willingness to listen to the opinions of others, even if they are contrary to his own.
Understand the facts and state the problem.
How to?
Write down all the facts first. Then ask everyone about the information they know.
Why is this necessary?
Sometimes, other people don’t know the facts we know. Missing some important facts makes capturing the problem inaccurate. This also brings everyone to understand the differences of opinion they have and in the end this can help the problem solving process.
While everyone is expressing their thoughts, ask them to write down the facts they know. Once everything is done, all the facts can be shared so that everyone has the same understanding of the problem.
Solve the problem together.
How to?
Know what everyone is thinking and it’s time to resolve the conflict. At this stage, everyone should understand the problem well. So, everyone can give the best solution. This is much better than just asking one person for a solution.
Why is this necessary?
Getting everyone’s solutions is important because everyone will feel included and their opinions considered. This will also result in more choice of solutions so that the best solution for the problem can be found. Everyone will be satisfied with the decisions taken.
After the discussion, ask everyone to come up with a solution. Then evaluate each incoming solution and choose the best solution that supports all parties.